Entering 37 weeks

Went to the midwife today for strep B test. Just a swab below, simple and straightforward. Nothing much to report as usual. Hopefully I do not have the bacteria so I don't need to be administered antibiotics during labour.

Was more curious to find out how much weight I gained. From last month, I only gained additional 1.5kg. Not too bad. A total of 11.5kg weight gain so far. Started at 53kg and weigh 64.5kg now. 

Baby's head is still down but not engaged yet. Will be going back for the next appointment in a week's time. I asked the midwife if I will be seeing doc or doing anymore scan, she said no unless I have not delivered by 39 weeks. Well I guess if baby's fine and I am well, there's no need for it. That's how the subsidized system works.

Let's see if the subsidized scheme really is much cheaper than going private. If not, the next time I might as well choose private.

Feeling a little depressed when I see myself in the mirror. Seems like more stretch marks appearing. Not on my belly but my upper thighs and possibly under my boobs and on my lower back just above my butt. Oh did I mention I already have very old stretch marks (already white) on my butt due to puberty? My consolation: they are hidden as long as I am clothed. I think when they fade to white I will feel much better as fresh marks are like purple/red.

They say gaining weight gradually and applying lotion helps but I still couldn't prevent it so, I guess I am genetically predisposed to it. Some people who are much bigger dun get them at all, so it's not about your size.

My underarms look very dark and dirty but people say it will go away so I'm not so concerned about that.

Knowing how vain I am, this the sacrifice I made to have baby Zac. No regrets!

初七，人日。

It's day 7 of the lunar new year. It is considered to be everyone's birthday.

I'm starting to get more tired. Yesterday I took a 2 hour nap after coming back from school and slept through the night but still needed to take naps when I reached work today.

I take 15-20mins naps about once or twice a day at work.

The stretch marks on my left thigh doesn't seem to be going away. Hubby comforted me saying they were not a lot. I saw some emerging on the inner thigh now...

I have many fears going through my mind.
- Will I be able to handle the pain of labour? How long will it take?
- Will baby be ok?
- It will be much more tiring when baby comes out. Can I manage well?
- Will I lose the excess weight?
- Will I be able to breastfeed successfully?
- How will I evolve as I take on the role of being a mother? I don't wanna be a paranoid mother.

I'm not tired of pregnancy, but I'm feeling restricted due to it. When can I wear nice clothes/heels again? I miss my sashimi, steak, runny egg yolks, etc.

Of course I have exciting thoughts about meeting baby Zac:
- Will he resemble me or hubby more?
- How heavy will he be?
- What kind of personality will he have?
- Will he have lots of hair?? :D
- I can't wait for his first smile!

Hubby says I am so much happier being pregnant. Everyday I thank God for giving me Zac. Its the greatest blessing God has given me, to become a mother. Hubby and I still can't believe we are becoming parents, we are gonna have a son. It's now down to a matter of weeks before I see Zac. 4 more days to March, 11 more days to 37 weeks.

My uncle was telling me my 3 cousins didn't come easy or cheap. They had problems conceiving each one of them and had to see the senior specialist for jabs. Though I empathize with him on that, but God also showed me that even with obstacles He was able to bless them with 3 children.

For those who are still trying, don't give up hope.

I have another round of CNY visitation this weekend... hmm. Just the thought of it makes me tired. :S Seeing the midwife again this Friday for Strep B test. Not sure what else to expect. Hopefully I can find out roughly how heavy baby is right now and also how heavy I am :O

Chinese New Year/36th week

Just made it passed 35 weeks. So I am in my 36th week now. Feeling a little anxious. I have not packed my hospital bag. Have not washed all the baby clothes. Have not gotten baby tub, baby cot is not here yet.

Chinese New Year wasn't particularly exciting for me. I did not buy new clothes due to my growing belly. Made do with what I already have. Was really tired during visitations. I cut down on a few houses this year. This is my second year giving red packets so by right I should not be receiving any already. But quite a number of relatives still blessed us! Maybe its the baby?! :D Did not eat alot during mealtimes but I snacked mainly on pineapple tarts, green tea, coke! all the sweet stuff made me feel very guilty.

I went to the manicurist on the eve to do my nails! She's home-based and stays just opposite my block! I will definitely be going back to her the next time. I had a classic pedicure and gelish manicure done and it cost only $75. $25 for the pedicure, $35 + $15 (nail art) for manicure. However, her services do not include scrub. Its really affordable and no additional surcharge for CNY period as I got a discount code ;)

I wanted to have hot pink glitters for my nails but the pink glitters she had were paler, what a let down.

I'm planning to do something to my hair before giving birth. My hair looks ok overall even though the last time I rebonded my hair was 9 months ago. I'm afraid I would not have time to do my hair  and hormones may wreck it (no drastic hairloss please!) I heard from the manicurist that even her friend with relatively thick hair was reduced to having bald patches. I have really thick hair as well but hearing that made me anxious =X

I also realized I could not fit into my old shoes anymore! During the photoshoot last week I brought my wedding heels only to realize I had to squeeze into them! Ever since I entered 2nd Trimester I bought new flats and stopped wearing heels and old shoes but I never thought my feet actually grew bigger... oh no.

Sweet moments between Hubbby and I. and baby Zac haha

Somebody is growing really strong bones and muscles! I will miss feeling his movements. Still so amazed by how much Zac grew, feels surreal I'm gonna be a mother soon. I'm truly blessed.

Valentine's Day

We never celebrated Valentine's Day, but I planned for something special on that day only to realize it was the 14th of February. It was also 9 years and 10 months since we got together, time flies!

A month ago, I booked and paid for the deposit of a maternity photoshoot! I was inspired by Fann Wong's Marie France Ad and thought I would like to leave a beautiful memory for myself and Zac Zac. Didn't want to wait for the next time as I am not sure if I will still look as good for subsequent pregnancies.

After doing some research, I decided to take up the package from a certain photography studio as I feel the price is reasonable, with makeup and hairstyling services included. I looked through their portfolio and find their style quite classy:

PACKAGE TERMS AND FEATURE - $358
› female photographer
› 1 hour studio photography session
› 3 outfit changes
› makeup and hair-styling for expectant mothers
› husbands have the option to join in
› 1 x A4 print with frame
› 5 x 5R prints
› 10 soft copy

I actually shortlisted another studio but found their package too expensive (above $500) - no makeup/hairstyling, not sure about outfits as they seems to only have sashes and very see through fabrics. Only 1 big print without frame and 10 soft copies. (the one above have 5 smaller prints.) But their portfolio looks really good.

So this was me before the photoshoot, sans makeup...

After makeup! I love the hair the makeup artist did for me. I want to perm my hair, not sure if it will turn out well? She also applied eyelid tape so that my eyelids will look more pronounced. The problem wth my eyelids are that they will appear hidden when I smile in photos. My eyes will also look much much smaller. Usually I tell the MUA not to apply them but not sure why this time I just left them on.

There were not many photos which were to our liking, a little disappointing actually. I expected more for the price we paid. But I'm generally still happy with the photos selected. The photographer made the shooting experience a pleasant one. I must say I enjoyed the shoot.

We were informed we should be getting the photos about 1 week after CNY. After we left the studio, we bumped into our church friend. She had hers done at another studio, for the price of $100 and got back all her soft copies!! Good price she paid and the photos were still decent. But of course she did not have other additional services. I guess it really depends on what you want.

Can't wait to share the photos here! Looking forward to CNY!

34th week

Time flies, it's already halfway through the school term! I will be finishing my lessons before Chinese New Year.

This also means I'm inching closer to seeing Zac... I try not to think too much about it because I will be worried that I can't handle labour pains. So I am enjoying now! I believe in visualizing and speaking out: I will have a smooth and fast natural delivery, no tear, manageable pain, baby and I safe and sound.

Of course if things don't turn out as I wished I will trust doctor's decision. Health and safety of mother and baby are most important. Although I really hope I do not have to go through a C-Sect.

Zac's movements are so vigorous everyday, sometimes I am concerned, is he getting enough sleep?? haha

But every time I feel so comforted when he moves, and I will acknowledge him by patting or stroking my belly. I will tell him "Yes, mummy is here, mummy love you." His hiccups are so strong now, I can see my belly 'bouncing'.

Current pregnancy symptoms, as usual nothing much to report on. Except for achy finger joints. I have also gained 10kg! I tell myself its all the baby and not me! Don't want to worry about gaining weight, most importantly baby must be healthy.

Went to see the midwife last Friday. No scanning was done but just to feel baby's position and measure heart rate. I already knew baby was head down ever since the last scan and I keep telling him to stay there! Midwife also showed me roughly how big is baby's head! She also informed me will be doing the Strep B test next appointment. A pity that my appointment falls on the day we have our Mass ALC Meeting.

Upcoming events for week 6:
1) I am going for my maternity photoshoot! Don't wanna miss this important milestone in my life!
2) Dasha's wedding :D

Week 7:
1) End of SDR and Chinese New Year week!

Gender preference

Before I got married, I wanted a boy. I think I watched too many shows about boys being important as they need to carry on the family line. Furthermore, I had this mindset that boys are harder to conceive (no idea why :S) I also felt girls were troublesome. (with reference to myself haha!)

Later on after I got married, every one around me were all expecting boys! I started to worry, what if I only have sons and no daughters?! My mother-in-law had all sons and I thought having a girl would be a refreshing experience for the family. I started to yearn for a girl instead.

My perception started to change after going for the nuchal translucency scan at 3 months.

Combined with my blood test results, I was told that my baby had a higher risk of having Down's Syndrome. We saw the results before seeing the doctor (occupational hazard la, like looking at psychological reports, doctor's memo). Hubby and I knew what she wanted to tell us. We were sent for counselling to help us decide what to do next. In my hastiness, I asked to be scheduled to go for Chorionic villus sampling (CVS) the next day.

So what is CVS all about? (extracted from Wikipedia)
Chorionic villus sampling (CVS), is a form of prenatal diagnosis to determine chromosomal or genetic disorders in the fetus. It entails sampling of the chorionic villus (placental tissue) and testing it for chromosomal abnormalities. CVS usually takes place at 10–12 weeks' gestation, earlier than amniocentesis or percutaneous umbilical cord blood sampling. It is the preferred technique before 15 weeks.

Although this procedure is mostly associated with testing for Down Syndrome, overall, CVS can detect more than 200 disorders.

And the risks:
Risk of miscarriage in CVS is about 0.5 - 1%. Apart from a risk of miscarriage, there is a risk of infection and amniotic fluid leakage. The resulting amniotic fluid leak can develop into a condition known as oligohydramnios, which is low amniotic fluid level. If the resulting oligohydramnios is not treated and the amniotic fluid continues to leak it can result in the baby developing hypoplastic lungs (underdeveloped lungs).

Basically, the procedure is similar to Amniocentesis but instead of drawing the amniotic fluid, the placental tissue is retrieved. This will enable us to find out the chromosomal makeup of the baby. In other words, we can also find out for sure if baby is a boy or a girl.

Why did I do it? If my baby has DS, I want to be prepared on how to care for my baby. Special needs or not, the baby is still my child. As an educator, I have also seen how people with special needs achieve more than what we usually imagine. We needed to wait 2 weeks for the results to be out. I also had to go back for a scan to check whether there are any abnormalities in baby's heart.

After the procedure, I had stomach cramps. It was exactly like menstrual cramps and I felt horrible. I had to rest at the clinic for awhile before going home. I started to ask myself what did I just do?? I cried when I reached home as I realized I had put my baby at risk. The thought of what I had done could cause a miscarriage made me feel so guilty and I just kept saying sorry to baby.

Thanks to my church friends for praying, soon I felt a sense of peace enveloping me. Though I had 2 weeks of waiting, I did not feel anxious. I also had a revelation on what it meant to be at peace. No matter what the results, I know God has prepared us. I also kept monitoring myself to see if I had any bleeding/discomfort.

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment."

Fast forward, on the day of the cardiac scan, I was more excited to see baby. Thoughts of whether baby has DS or not did not bother me at all. Baby's heart was found to be well-developed, doctor also confirmed that baby is healthy and is a BOY :) Boy or girl, it doesn't matter anymore. I was just so thankful to God.

Pregnancy Taboos

I have heard so many things I should avoid eating, doing, etc.

For the safety of baby, I already stopped using Epiduo (a prescription gel) when I started trying.

But I broke some others, as a lot of these are avoided due to fear or ignorance.

One of the things that I am not suppose to do (according to Internet sources) is... using Salicylic acid. It's one of my favourite skincare ingredient as it helps to prevent acne and normalize skin cell turnover rate. It is also oil soluble, which means it will clean your pores rather than just exfoliating the surface of your skin. It is also available over-the-counter, you don't need to see a doctor to get it. I believe that says a lot already if it is readily available.

Salicylic Acid, or BHA, is also the active ingredient in the drug Aspirin. Basically most tests are done on ingesting Salycilic Acid (aspirin). No tests have been done on topical application of Salicylic acid. But some doctors say it is ok as long as the content does not exceed 2% in the product. Topical application should be fine. Most doctors advised against it only because they would rather be more cautious about it. I know many mothers stop using them but I personally feel it is not a cause for concern. So I used it in peace for the past 7 months.

I think the logic behind it is similar to hair treatments/manicures during pregnancy. I asked a particular gynae who was pregnant herself if i needed to avoid any of these procedures but she said there's no need. She told me everything that we use have chemicals anyway.

I avoid hair treatments simply because I am afraid my hair might not turn out as what I expected due to hormones. For example, your perm might turn out frizzy instead, or does not last. Your rebonding might not be straight. Hair colour might not be true to what you see. I stopped my IPL sessions as well and this is the same reason they told me, it might not be as effective = waste of time/money. One hairstylist I spoke to told me all her pregnant clients had no issues with their hair after those treatments. But for me, I choose to wait because I don't want to risk wasting money if my hair goes haywire!

At the end of the day, it is up to your own discretion and how comfortable you feel about such things. I also strongly believe that pregnant women have the right to look good and no one should ever judge another about their beauty routine.

My mantra is that its better to be more mindful about what I eat instead of what I apply. What I eat goes straight into my body but what I apply can only penetrate so far. But even when it comes to my diet I eat most things in moderation and listen to what I crave for. Its hard for me to stick to healthy food all the time! I believe in giving in to cravings but not over indulging. I also feel that if you are craving you might be lacking something so just trust your body. (though I admit I could have made healthier choices some times)

I will be going for my first manicure session since getting pregnant as Chinese New Year is approaching. Would like to have beautiful long nails before baby arrive! I think I will be sticking to short nails for a long long time after that. Don't want to risk scratching my darling.