Pre-mummy jitters

Sleepless nights, thinking about the impending birth. Worried about the pain (how can a baby go through down there??), worried about having to go through a c-sect if failure to progress. How bad would the pain be, will it warrant an epidural? Should I? Worried about not being able to breastfeed/low supply. Hubby admitted he is also 'scared'.

Reading about birth experiences doesn't help either, I'm curious la. Can't help looking. Also been reading lots of different stories mummies everywhere been through, trying to conceive, stillbirths, ectopic pregnancy, miscarriage. Every woman who becomes a mother (or has the desire to be one) seems to share an unspoken bond.

I was just telling hubby its now 一天过一天. I'm at 37 weeks, day 3 - 19 more days. My appointment with the midwife this Friday again, and I wonder if I can make it to the next appointment?

There were some points during the pregnancy I asked "What did I get myself into??" Am I ready?? But other times we talk about when we are going to have a second one... haha

I guess we can never be ready.

I don't really like the month of March, I don't find any dates that look nice. But I thought my original EDD 30th March looks nice. That would be 40 Weeks + 1 Day. I told baby, can come out on that day?? :D

2 more working days excluding today. I will have 2 weeks of rest/preparation. Just waiting for time to pass and preparing to hand over.

Yesterday I took over the class for my colleague. Those adorable kids. Gonna miss them. When I'm back from long leave they would soon be in Primary 5, how fast kids grow up! One of the triplet asked me, "Why is your nose so red?" I replied, red and big right?? Then I told her that there are many changes when a woman is pregnant. she later add on, "how come your tummy become bigger but not your other parts?"

I felt better after that haha.

My maternity photos are ready! Gonna collect them this Friday too. I planned quite a number of things for this Friday. Planning to do my hair, go for my appointment, collect the photos, will be having dinner with the bridesmaid team.

I'm actually craving for apple strudel now... Can I fly to Australia for one? I missed the one my cousin brought back, had it during CNY! yummy.

I shall end off with a picture of my bump at exactly 37 weeks!

See you soon my cutie pie...

初七，人日。

It's day 7 of the lunar new year. It is considered to be everyone's birthday.

I'm starting to get more tired. Yesterday I took a 2 hour nap after coming back from school and slept through the night but still needed to take naps when I reached work today.

I take 15-20mins naps about once or twice a day at work.

The stretch marks on my left thigh doesn't seem to be going away. Hubby comforted me saying they were not a lot. I saw some emerging on the inner thigh now...

I have many fears going through my mind.
- Will I be able to handle the pain of labour? How long will it take?
- Will baby be ok?
- It will be much more tiring when baby comes out. Can I manage well?
- Will I lose the excess weight?
- Will I be able to breastfeed successfully?
- How will I evolve as I take on the role of being a mother? I don't wanna be a paranoid mother.

I'm not tired of pregnancy, but I'm feeling restricted due to it. When can I wear nice clothes/heels again? I miss my sashimi, steak, runny egg yolks, etc.

Of course I have exciting thoughts about meeting baby Zac:
- Will he resemble me or hubby more?
- How heavy will he be?
- What kind of personality will he have?
- Will he have lots of hair?? :D
- I can't wait for his first smile!

Hubby says I am so much happier being pregnant. Everyday I thank God for giving me Zac. Its the greatest blessing God has given me, to become a mother. Hubby and I still can't believe we are becoming parents, we are gonna have a son. It's now down to a matter of weeks before I see Zac. 4 more days to March, 11 more days to 37 weeks.

My uncle was telling me my 3 cousins didn't come easy or cheap. They had problems conceiving each one of them and had to see the senior specialist for jabs. Though I empathize with him on that, but God also showed me that even with obstacles He was able to bless them with 3 children.

For those who are still trying, don't give up hope.

I have another round of CNY visitation this weekend... hmm. Just the thought of it makes me tired. :S Seeing the midwife again this Friday for Strep B test. Not sure what else to expect. Hopefully I can find out roughly how heavy baby is right now and also how heavy I am :O